Barrio

Basics: $6-7 margaritas; $5 sangria and select wines; $3 Mexican beers; $3-5 small plates; $1 smoked salt caramels. Daily specials run 3:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m.; evening specials run Sundays through Thursdays 10:00 p.m. to midnight, Fridays and Saturdays from 11:00 p.m. to 1 a.m.

Walking into Barrio, particularly on a rainy Seattle afternoon, you could see why the metal letters spelling out the restaurant’s name next to the entrance are rusted. Understandable: it’s Seattle. It rains here. We get wet. Now where can I hang my umbrella?

Once inside, though, the bar's fascinatingly cobbled-together décor vanquishes most thoughts of overcast skies. Barrio makes excellent use of its space, combining wood, metal and concrete with remarkable ease. Square angles and curved arcs playfully banter throughout the main dining area. Molé-colored walls contrast against a dozen or so splintery espresso-colored 4x6 beams suspended from the ceiling over a swooping fireplace.

And of course: the candles. So many goddamn candles. A thick, latticed grid separates the two dining areas, supporting hundreds of luminous pillar candles. The rear dining area features several more dozen spiraling down from the ceiling, their flames flickering and shimmying off the maize-colored walls. (Side note: Cameron, Barrio's general manager, assures me each candle is lit by hand every night. On closer inspection the candles, at least in the latticework wall, look to be faux pillars rigged with oil lamps. Either way, the effect is striking and impossible to overlook.)

On the whole, Barrio sports a rugged, masculine décor, anchored in strong, bold statements and supported by other subtler elements of design. Coincidentally or not, the beverages are the same: bold flavors with subtle undertones to enhance, elevate and improve.

The APIC* and I are, admittedly, accustomed to simple, formulaic drinks when going out: he the vodka and ginger as of late, I the vodka soda as of always. When we sidled up to the Barrios snaking bar, covered in a mosaic of jagged, uneven porcelain chips, we felt inspired to order something more sophisticated and adult.

(And by “inspired” I mean that Barrio doesn’t list well drinks for happy hour, so we were pretty much screwed as far as two-note sippables.)

The margaritas ($6), frankly, can be dangerous and go down entirely too easily. On the specialty drink menu, the rum-based PFC Punch #1 ($10) was by far the favorite of the four we ordered: a sweet, peachy cocktail packing the tiniest trace of alcoholic assault that subtly stings all the way down.

The tacos ($3) were stuffed to the point where a knife and fork made more practical sense than attempting to eat by hand. The pork loin al pastor is particularly worth mention: the spicy, red sauce blended together well with onions, cilantro and pineapple extras.

The bar packs up after happy hour, and I mean really packs up. On a Wednesday there was a steady stream of people waiting up to 15 minutes for seating. It was around this point when the place grew too loud for the APIC*, which I will concede is one of Barrio's few detractors: with all the exposed concrete and metal, there's not a lot going on as far as sound absorption.

Walking out more bleary-eyed than before (thank you, expert bartenders!), and struggling to push open the heavy Mexican mission-style doors, we again came face-to-face with the restaurant’s rusted letters. After spending some time in the interior, it’s as if these patinaed letters play off the masculine decor, foreshadowing what first-timers can expect inside.

Whether that's by design or by the booze, I'll let you decide.

Barrio. 1420 12th Ave (12th between Pike and Union), Seattle’s Capitol Hill (Also 10650 NE 4th St, Bellevue). Daily 3:00-6:00 p.m.; late night Sundays through Thursdays 10:00 to midnight, Fridays and Saturday 11:00 p.m. to 1 a.m.

Kristos

Basics: $4 well drinks, $3 Bud Lights, $3.75 draft beers, $5 wines, $2-7 small plates. Daily specials run 3:00 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. and 10:00 p.m. to close. Well vodka: McCormick’s.


Upon entering Kristos, patrons are almost asphyxiated by the color blue: the walls are painted a deep, lustrous cobalt that looms its way up to the second story loft. Teensy, delicate ultramarine-colored occasional lamps dangle in clusters over the tables. Even the booth's seat backs are upholstered in a roughly thatched fabric of steel blue.

Built in behind the bar is an irregular patchwork of darkened champagne-colored stone, like something out of The Brady Bunch den (but in a very appealing way). Lithe purple tulips swoon out of bud vases, while pristine white orchids float completely submerged in water contained in wide-mouthed hurricane vases.

It’s a nice a scene to drink in as the generous gin and gingers poured here. A downright beautiful scene, in fact, until you look out the windows, reality kicks in, and you remember you’re getting a buzz on under the freeway.

Kristos is gorgeous but would be better suited in trendier Belltown than right under Interstate 5’s Ship Canal Bridge. The sleek, glamorous bar with a soft-spoken electronica soundtrack has little in common with the overly claustrophobic Serafina or the beer-sloshed Zoo Tavern, two of Eastlake's mainstays. But it seems to be working. Eastlake has already undergone a metamorphosis in the past few years, acquiring a half-dozen or so swank and trendy condo complexes and a few specialty boutiques. Maybe Kristos is sign of things to continue to come in this neighborhood.

But none of that matters during happy hour. This Greek-inspired lounge is consistently busy as customers continually fill the blue-underlit bar. The drinks, tonight poured by Kristo himself (or Chris, as he’s better known), were heavy handed, which is exactly what a rail drink should be. The chicken Caeser ($7) was fairly unremarkable, though the Greek salad ($5) came as a hearty, heaping mound of chopped cucumbers, bell peppers, tomatoes, Kalamata olives, red onions and feta. Not the most outstanding salad ever, but it more than did the job of filling our drunk stomachs.

Kristos. 3218 Eastlake Ave E (Eastlake and Harvard), Seattle’s Eastlake. Daily 3:00-6:30 p.m., late night 10:00 p.m. to close.

The Diller Room

Basics: $5 Grey Goose, Bacardi, or Bombay drinks; $5 select wine and beer; $5 small plates; $8 specialty drinks. Daily specials run 5:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. (As with any new bar, specials subject to change.)


If, say, Clark Gable and George Clooney were to open a bar together, The Diller Room might very well be the outcome. There’s a dual air of rustic, old-world charm with heavy doses of no-nonsense, modern-day sensibility that mingle together very nicely: much like the decent-pour gin and tonics I ordered.

The decor takes a cue from this everything-old-is-new-again theme: beveled mirrors and plush wingchairs adorn a sunken bar with exposed brick and piping. Traditional round barstools are placed near Victorian chairs upholstered with unraveling tapestry. Sleek, low mahogany leather sofas dimly reflect light from a chandelier and sconces covered in crystal beads. The contradictory furniture pairings work very much in The Diller Room’s favor, gilded letters and all.

Though the interior comes off especially pleasing, I’m giving the newly opened bar the benefit of the doubt when it comes to drinks. Staff members are still finding their footing, so I can’t completely write them off during these formative weeks. Beverages were so-so as far as toxicity levels, though a clink of the glass to the owners for offering middle-to-top-shelf booze at bottom-shelf prices. The food was hit more than miss -- the BLT sliders garnered raves from Brett and pans from Troy. The Salumi platter had little complaint, nor should it: five bucks for some of the finest locally cured meats Seattle has to offer is an outstanding price.

Anyone choosing to venture into the specialty drink menu should sample the Sapphire Fizz: gin, Chambord, limes, egg white and powdered sugar, shaken and served up. The layered, complex taste of the savory gin with sweet raspberry overtones made for a frothy, delicious drink steeped in booze that kicks hard to the gullet.

(Side note: Worst. Men’s room. I’ve ever seen. And this coming from a guy who frequents many a gay bar, which says something. A deep-sink worthy of high school janitors paired with a non-functioning hot water faucet? Really? Health codes aside, it’s as if Clark and George allowed Pauly Shore to couch surf for a week. And, honestly, who would pay to see that movie?)

The Diller Room. 1224 First Ave (First and Union), Seattle’s Downtown. Daily, 5:00-7:00 p.m. Specials subject to change.

Boka Kitchen and Lounge

Basics: $5 well drinks, $4 draft beers, $6 select wine, $3-12.50 food. Daily specials run 2:30 p.m.(!) to 6:00 p.m. and 10:00 p.m. to close.


When is a well drink not a well drink?

Ah, a Carroll-esque riddle for the ages (or at least for the recessed economy). As it turns out Hotel 1000's bar Boka -- and several other places we've been to lately -- considers a well drink to be booze and anything coming out of the spigot. Gin and tonic? Sweet, so Brett's in the clear. Vodka soda? Great, I'm good to go. Rum and diet? If we had a rum drinker in our crowd ... well, then that one fifth of the God-awful stuff wouldn't have languished at a year and a half's worth of parties and pre-funks before we finally drank it.

God that was a bad night.

But anyway. Screwdriver, greyhound, or vodka cran drinkers can find themselves paying an added buck per drink. And while that isn't a big deal in the long run, it just struck us as kind of shady without any mention on the menu.

That and the weak drinks -- probably a measured pour -- were about the only complaints we could find of Boka. Short, squat chairs upholstered in cream-colored faux-crocodile draw you into the sleek, modern ambience, full of plush leather rails and opaque milkglass bamboo. The well-stocked bar, wine rack, and rear dining area's walls glow brightly, cycling through numerous shades of frost-biten colored flourescence.

Food-wise we fared much better. Truffle fries were much tastier than their usual burger accompaniment counterparts ("That's probably the fanciest presentation of french fries I've ever seen!" the APIC gushed). The crab cakes I ordered were amazing: airy and fluffy on the inside, while satisfyingly crunchy on the out. The rest of the food menu, though, underwhelmed: everything looked good, but none of it sounded extremely appetizing.

But maybe we have lowbrow tastes: on the way home, we totally hit up Subway for a couple $5 footlongs.

Boka Kitchen and Bar. 1010 First Ave (First & Madison), Seattle's Downtown. Daily 2:30-6:00 p.m., late night 10:00 p.m. to close.

The Hideout

Basics: well drinks are $4 (though Tanqueray and tonics were going for a decently-priced $6); extremely limited food options; citrus juices are fresh-squeezed. Weekday specials run from 4:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m.


The Hideout can be difficult to classify. I, for one, would call it an elegant dive bar. My APIC* Arlen called it “tacky, but it seems like they did that on purpose.” Yeah, bars should be dark. But The Hideout takes that concept to a new extreme, painting the walls black and placing thick burgundy velvet curtains over the front windows to block out all outside light.

Lighting fixtures and filaments are, for the most part, eschewed. The Hideout relies mostly on strategically placed candlelight for illumination, with an assist from three mismatched rustic (rusted?) chandeliers. The Hideout wisely moves red light bulbs from the darkroom to their refrigeration units, which go easy on the dilated eyes.

Odd, though, that such a dark bar has such an outstanding collection of Northwest art. Over 70 paintings cover the walls in an artistic orgy of a mosaic, rotating on a weekly basis. This week’s selection ran the gamut of ferryboats, breasts, dice, octopi, a scuba diver emerging from a shower and a lion-headed woman taking a gigantic cock up her ass. No. Really.

Well drinks transcend the dive bar-ish feel, thanks to the pain-in-the-ass-to-make-but-oh-so-tasty fresh-squeezed juice: Gordon’s vodka has never tasted so amazing or gone down as smooth. I easily went through four heavy-pour wells without any complaints. Stay away from the gimlet, though: Brett’s drink had zero alcoholic kick to it. Lovers of screwdrivers and greyhounds should seriously consider making this a regular haunt.

The specialty drink menu, though, was cumbersome and somewhat pretentious. I will award The Hideout some points for creativity: The Hemingway, for example, is a shot of hornitos tequila, a Dos Equis and a Nat Sherman cigarette. The Rhubarb Manhattan I ordered (Makers, Aperol, Cynar and rhubarb bitters), however, definitely disappointed. For a bar that has some of the best well drinks in the city, I expected a bit more from the specialty menu. At a $7 to $14 price point, you’ll be better off sticking to the screwdriver.

*Alcoholic Partner In Crime. Arlen and I go way back.

The Hideout. 1005 Boren Ave (Boren and Madison), Seattle’s First Hill. Weekdays, 4:00-7:00 p.m.